J + M IN HIDING

We will be returning home soon after quite a journey. Surprisingly to me, I'm (mostly) ready to come home.  For one, I miss my students. Even though I actively blocked work off from the trip, such as not checking work emails, my students still creeped into my mind from time to time. I wonder how they're doing, and not just in math. I also hear myself think that there's so much I want to teach in a class, other than the math part. How that will exactly happen is still a mystery. Genuine classroom moments require that I be healthy mentally/physically/emotionally, and that might mean taking it easy for the remainder of this school year. That's okay. I hope that even when I'm low, I'm still giving something while I'm at work. I must and want to take care of myself, so that I can be open and available whenever someone wants to reach out. Second, I miss all the little comforts of home. Our queen-size bed, delicious Italian coffee, my piano, and my books, an...

I might end up on the Fukuoka local news channel. How random! Jessica and I were having a mellow day from feeling super exhausted from traveling via train to Hakata the day before. Our only excursion od the day was deciding to go to this used bookstore chain, known as BookOff, that also sells used DVDS, CDs, video games, game consoles, as well as good condition used electronics and clothing/accessories among other things that are too many to describe. While in the store, a young person approaches me with a mic and camera-person asking if I would agree to be interviewed. Sure. Why not. First they asked if I spoke Japanese, to which I apologized (I can only order food). They wanted to know why, a foreigner like me, was at BookOff. All I could do was answer honestly. I was searching for a game-boy and its old games that I missed from my childhood. It got lost and I was hoping to find one because I miss it. I am looking for a piece of my childhood. Such a sweet story, no? Then, they had ...

What are the odds that an old man would fall just outside a restaurant as we were waiting for our dinner? And that out of the entire place I happened to choose the window seat facing him? It's been only slightly over three months since my dad passed on. I thought to myself, "Please, not again." as I went to help the man. I didn't see him fall but heard the thump and I waited a moment to see if he was moving or if passers by would help, of which not much of either was happening. I briefly hesitated again, because of the language barrier. And then I went out because it didn't look good. He wasn't getting up. I assumed he had a stroke or heart attack (could've just been dizzy too) and had someone call an ambulance while I stayed low to the ground with him. For a moment there, I thought he was going to give out. All I could think and accidentally say aloud for a brief moment was "f*@#"; F*"@# if I'm going to lose him, and it doesn't ma...

What do I do with the feelings of fear? The desire to cling to the safety of my partner? It's natural, yet unnatural. Natural considering how I witnessed the loss of my father directly. Unnatural as I'm now squeezing Jessica tightly out of fear of another loss. She misses and wants to explore herself apart from me at times. I too want to explore myself apart from her. I want to come up with various ideas and plans, and choose some if I would like. Even investigating thoughts and feelings in solitude is worthwhile. I miss simply doing that. Yet I fear to be apart from her for too long, let alone being away overnight or for seperate trips (as when I went to Korea myself this past summer). I try to imagine my father. His strength was profound. I know he was only human and had fear in him, which he expressed sometimes to me. However, the way he conducted himself was unwavering. As many parents, he found meaning in his life by caring for family. Despite being disabled by a shotg...

Depsite the intestinal issues, Vientnam to me had such delicious food. So frangrant and light. My body (initially at least) was responding to their style, likely from the balanced portions of noodles/rice, protein, and veggies. Somehow, vegetables are hard to come by in a meal unless explicitly searched for and/or ordered in places like Thailand, Taiwan, and even Japan. In Vietnam, it's automatically part of the meal. We also saw some cultural places. Most notable being the large statue of the lady buddha. Awe-inspiring. The history on her is interesting too. Hoi An, although a tourist town now, was still pleasant to walk through because of it's old houses and character. And we found the top food joints there. Finally, we had a chance to visit the Women's Cultural Museum in Hanoi. It was amazing to learn how much the women of Vietnam contributed to their country. And how devastating, chaotic, and unfathomable the war in Vietnam was. I learned a lot. It was needed. I...

Feeling much better (although not quite 100%). Might be that we caught some intestinal parasite. I can't imagine how much worse it would have been if we didn't have our shots and preventative medications before leaving Vancouver. Thank goodness for our diligence making it such that our discomfort didn't last too long/isn't that bad now. We are in Osaka now. Where we are staying is very quiet place, yet accessible to all the eating and shopping. I am enjoying mostly resting and having only one major outing a day. I think I will keep it like this (or maybe even a few days of less!) from now on. After all, I want to be somewhat refreshed and mentally re-centred when we returned next month. There's a lot to do when I return. That being said, Vietnam and Taiwan weren't a complete bust. We saw a few things and ate a few things. I just haven't updated yet because I've been resting. Picture updates on those sometime in the near future.