J + M IN HIDING

What are the odds that an old man would fall just outside a restaurant as we were waiting for our dinner? And that out of the entire place I happened to choose the window seat facing him? It's been only slightly over three months since my dad passed on. I thought to myself, "Please, not again." as I went to help the man. I didn't see him fall but heard the thump and I waited a moment to see if he was moving or if passers by would help, of which not much of either was happening. I briefly hesitated again, because of the language barrier. And then I went out because it didn't look good. He wasn't getting up. I assumed he had a stroke or heart attack (could've just been dizzy too) and had someone call an ambulance while I stayed low to the ground with him. For a moment there, I thought he was going to give out. All I could think and accidentally say aloud for a brief moment was "f*@#"; F*"@# if I'm going to lose him, and it doesn't ma...

What do I do with the feelings of fear? The desire to cling to the safety of my partner? It's natural, yet unnatural. Natural considering how I witnessed the loss of my father directly. Unnatural as I'm now squeezing Jessica tightly out of fear of another loss. She misses and wants to explore herself apart from me at times. I too want to explore myself apart from her. I want to come up with various ideas and plans, and choose some if I would like. Even investigating thoughts and feelings in solitude is worthwhile. I miss simply doing that. Yet I fear to be apart from her for too long, let alone being away overnight or for seperate trips (as when I went to Korea myself this past summer). I try to imagine my father. His strength was profound. I know he was only human and had fear in him, which he expressed sometimes to me. However, the way he conducted himself was unwavering. As many parents, he found meaning in his life by caring for family. Despite being disabled by a shotg...

Depsite the intestinal issues, Vientnam to me had such delicious food. So frangrant and light. My body (initially at least) was responding to their style, likely from the balanced portions of noodles/rice, protein, and veggies. Somehow, vegetables are hard to come by in a meal unless explicitly searched for and/or ordered in places like Thailand, Taiwan, and even Japan. In Vietnam, it's automatically part of the meal. We also saw some cultural places. Most notable being the large statue of the lady buddha. Awe-inspiring. The history on her is interesting too. Hoi An, although a tourist town now, was still pleasant to walk through because of it's old houses and character. And we found the top food joints there. Finally, we had a chance to visit the Women's Cultural Museum in Hanoi. It was amazing to learn how much the women of Vietnam contributed to their country. And how devastating, chaotic, and unfathomable the war in Vietnam was. I learned a lot. It was needed. I...

Feeling much better (although not quite 100%). Might be that we caught some intestinal parasite. I can't imagine how much worse it would have been if we didn't have our shots and preventative medications before leaving Vancouver. Thank goodness for our diligence making it such that our discomfort didn't last too long/isn't that bad now. We are in Osaka now. Where we are staying is very quiet place, yet accessible to all the eating and shopping. I am enjoying mostly resting and having only one major outing a day. I think I will keep it like this (or maybe even a few days of less!) from now on. After all, I want to be somewhat refreshed and mentally re-centred when we returned next month. There's a lot to do when I return. That being said, Vietnam and Taiwan weren't a complete bust. We saw a few things and ate a few things. I just haven't updated yet because I've been resting. Picture updates on those sometime in the near future.

Looks like we will be out of service longer. Seems like we caught something (stomach/guts related) in Vietnam. At first it was Jessica and I thought I was more immune. Nope. Me too. Sucks so much! The food was so delicious in Vietnam. But their vendors (even what are known as 'restaurants') aren't hygenic yet. We thought we would be okay because we made sure we took our shots/medications for travelers diarrhea, typhoid fever, tetanus booster etc. before we left. Nope. Silly of me to think we could run around Vietnam seeing everything and eating everything. We missed half the stuff we meant to see there. Now in Taiwan, I've given up trying to make a deal with my body to hurry up and heal so I can enjoy Taiwan. We've just been sleeping, walking a little, eating hardly anything and sleeping some more. And Taiwan is almost over. Sigh. I've told myself we can come back to Taiwan easily during a spring break sometime if we want. The goal now is to rest for Japan...